Wednesday, February 25, 2009


Bobby Jindal, savior of the GOP. After the most cosmically inept, stiff, cheesy, heave-inducing, high-school-debate-team-polishy, condescending simultaneous tripe and hopeful grab for the 2012 nomination, Pym watched his speech the next day, grew to giant-size, smashed his Tivo with a giant fist, shrunk to ant-size, and hid in John Boehner's pocket as the GOP itself shrunk to ant-sized irrelevance and time-warped fist-shakery. Many Americans nationwide called in sick the day following the speech, unable to wipe the image of Jindal's phony-baloney smile from their psyches. Several men and women were rushed to St. John's Medical Center after an attempt to scoop out their memories of the speech with a melon baller.

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