Friday, March 20, 2009


Tonight we explore the mystery of Oreo Cakesters.

They are not cake. They are not cookie. More like co-akie, whatever that might actually be.

Oreo Cakesters can be traced back to ancient Babylon. Unearthed friezes and statues tell the fragmented tale of Orayo, hermaphrodite bastard son/daughter of Queen Semiramis, who reigned over his own hidden shadow kingdom in an effort to avenge himself upon his mother for his bi-sexed physical makeup. Condemned to a life of being neither fish nor fowl, Orayo's shadow court of alchemists and sorcerers dedicated their black arts to combining dark chemicals and foodstuffs until they were unrecognizable as food of any kind. Such combinations would confound the masses to the point where their search for answers would lead them to insanity, a life of quiet desperation, or directly to the ancient black arts responsible, thus increasing recruitment and providing the master sorcerers with the psychic energy needed to continue their enchantments.

Join us next week when we explore why hot women always fall for assholes.

No comments:

Post a Comment